DogBoston’s Dog Blog

“If your dog doesn’t like someone you probably shouldn’t either.” - Unknown

“Whoever said you can’t buy happiness forgot little puppies.” - Gene Hill

“In dog years I’m dead.” - Unknown

“In order to really enjoy a dog, one doesn’t merely try to train him to be semihuman. The point of it is to open oneself to the possibility of becoming partly a dog.” - Edward Hoagland

“I once decided not to date a guy because he wasn’t excited to meet my dog. I mean, this was like not wanting to meet my mother.” - Bonnie Schacter, Founder of the Single Pet Owner’s Society Singles Group

“A cat sees us as the dogs…A cat sees himself as the human.” - Unknown

“Dogs are our link to paradise. They don’t know evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring–it was peace.” - Milan Kundera

“If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater. . . suggest that he wear a tail.” - Fran Lebowitz

“You can say any fool thing to a dog, and the dog will give you this look that says, `My God, you’re RIGHT! I NEVER would’ve thought of that!’” - Dave Barry

“He is my other eyes that can see above the clouds; my other ears that hear above the winds. He is the part of me that can reach out into the sea. He has told me a thousand times over that I am his reason for being; by the way he rests against my leg; by the way he thumps his tail at my smallest smile; by the way he shows his hurt when I leave without taking him. (I think it makes him sick with worry when he is not along to care for me.) When I am wrong, he is delighted to forgive. When I am angry, he clowns to make me smile. When I am happy, he is joy unbounded. When I am a fool, he ignores it. When I succeed, he brags. Without him, I am only another man. With him, I am all-powerful. He is loyalty itself. He has taught me the meaning of devotion. With him, I know a secret comfort and a private peace. He has brought me understanding where before I was ignorant. His head on my knee can heal my human hurts. His presence by my side is protection against my fears of dark and unknown things. He has promised to wait for me… whenever… wherever - in case I need him. And I expect I will - as I always have. He is just my dog.” - Gene Hill

“Breed not a savage dog, nor permit a loose stairway.” - Talmud

“In my day, we didn’t have dogs or cats. All I had was Silver Beauty, my beloved paper clip.” - Jennifer Hart, Arlington

“Man is an animal that makes bargains; no other animal does this - one dog does not change a bone with another.” - Adam Smith

“I would rather see the portrait of a dog that I know, than all the allegorical paintings they can show me in the world.” - Samuel Johnson

“When you feel dog tired at night, it may be because you’ve growled all day long.” – Unknown

“A really companionable and indispensable dog is an accident of nature. You can’t get it by breeding for it, and you can’t buy it with money. It just happens along.” - E B White, The Care and Training of a Dog

“Bulldogs are adorable, with faces like toads that have been sat on.” - Colette

“I think we are drawn to dogs because they are the uninhibited creatures we might be if we weren’t certain we knew better.” - George Bird Evans, “Troubles with Bird Dogs”

“Even the tiniest Poodle or Chihuahua is still a wolf at heart.” - Dorothy Hinshaw Patent, Dogs: The Wolf Within

“If dogs could talk it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one.” - Andy Rooney

“They [dogs] never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation.” - Jerome K. Jerome

“When a dog wags her tail and barks at the same time, how do you know which end to believe?” - Anonymous

“Newfoundland dogs are good to save children from drowning, but you must have a pond of water handy and a child, or else there will be no profit in boarding a Newfoundland.” - Josh Billings

“Things that upset a terrier may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great Dane.” - Smiley Blanton

“I’ve seen a look in dogs’ eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts.” - John Steinbeck

“What kind of life a dog . . . acquires. I have sometimes tried to imagine by kneeling or lying full length on the ground and looking up. The world then becomes strangely incomplete; one sees little but legs.” - E V Lucas

“You may have a dog that won’t sit up, roll over or even cook breakfast, not because she’s too stupid to learn how but because she’s too smart to bother.” - Rick Horowitz, Chicago Tribune

“My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can’t decide whether to ruin our carpets or ruin our lives.” - Rita Rudner

“To err is human, to forgive, canine.” - Unknown

“What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight; it’s the size of the fight in the dog.” - Dwight D. Eisenhower

“Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer.” - Leo Rosten

“If a picture wasn’t going very well I’d put a puppy dog in it, always a mongrel, you know, never one of the full bred puppies. And then I’d put a bandage on its foot… I liked it when I did it, but now I’m sick of it.” - Norman Rockwell

“Better not take a dog on the space shuttle, because if he sticks his head out when you’re coming home his face might burn up.” - “DEEP THOUGHTS” by Jack Handy

“I took my dog for a walk… all the way from New York to Florida… I said to him “There now you’re done.” - Steven Wright

“By what right has the dog come to be regarded as a “noble” animal? The more brutal and cruel and unjust you are to him the more your fawning and adoring slave he becomes; whereas, if you shamefully misuse a cat once she will always maintain a dignified reserve toward you afterward- you will never get her full confidence again.” - Mark Twain

“Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that is how dogs spend their lives.” - Sue Murphy

Do not make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans or they will treat you like dogs.” - Martha Scott

“The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven, not man’s.” - Mark Twain, Letter to W D Howells, 4/2/1899

“Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won’t buy the wag of his tail.” - Henry Wheeler Shaw

“Every dog must have his day.” - Jonathan Swift

“I spilled spot remover on my dog. He’s gone now.” - Steven Wright

“I hope if dogs ever take over the world, and they chose a king, they don’t just go by size, because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas.” - “DEEP THOUGHTS” by Jack Handy

“I put contact lenses in my dog’s eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles.” - Steven Wright

“Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.” - Dave Barry

“The dog was created specially for children. He is the god of frolic.” - Henry Ward Beecher

“Recipe; a series of step-by-step instructions for preparing ingredients you forgot to buy, in utensils you don’t own, to make a dish the dog won’t eat.” - Unknown

“Any member introducing a dog into the Society’s premises shall be liable to a fine of one pound. Any animal leading a blind person shall be deemed to be a cat.” - Rule 46, Oxford Union Society, London

“You gonna bark all day little doggy, or are you gonna bite?” - Mr. Blonde “Reservoir Dogs”

“Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamp-post how it feels about dogs.” - Christopher Hampton

“When a dog runs at you, whistle for him.” - Henry David Thoreau

“Flatterers look like friends, as wolves like dogs.” - George Chapman

“Dogs laugh, but they laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end.” - Max Eastman

“I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me they are the role model for being alive.” - Gilda Radner

“My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can. That’s almost $7.00 in dog money.” - Joe Weinstein

“Yesterday I was a dog. Today I’m a dog. Tomorrow I’ll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There’s so little hope for advancement.” - Snoopy

“Oh, yeah, what are you gonna do? Release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouth and when they bark, they shoot bees at you?” - Homer from the Simpsons

“How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn’t make it a leg.” - Abraham Lincoln

“Elizabeth’s back at the red cross, and I’m walking the dog.” - Bob Dole, on the Today Show, describing life after the elections, 1997

“It freshens your breath and helps prevent tartar.” - Mel Gibson, while eating a dog biscuit at Harvard, 1996

“Some days you’re the dog, some days you’re the hydrant.” - Unknown

“Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer.” - Leo Rosten

“Barking dogs don’t bite people they don’t know.” – Unknown

“A traveler must have the back of an ass to bear all, a tongue like the tail of a dog to flatter all, the mouth of a hog to eat what is set before him, the ear of a merchant to hear all and say nothing.” - Thomas Nashe

“Like dogs in a wheel, birds in a cage, or squirrels in a chain, ambitious men still climb and climb, with great labor, and incessant anxiety, but never reach the top.” - Robert Burton

“How’s it going Mr. Peterson?” - Woody “It’s a dog eat dog world, Woody, and I’m wearing milk bone underwear.” - Norm from Cheers

“Asthma doesn’t seem to bother me any more unless I’m around cigars or dogs. The thing that would bother me most would be a dog smoking a cigar.” - Steve Allen

“The biggest dog has been a pup.” - Joaquin Miller, US poet

“There are only two rules. One is E. M. Forster’s guide to Alexandria; the best way to know Alexandria is to wander aimlessly. The second is from the Psalms; grin like a dog and run about through the city.” - Jan Morris

“Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost what it feels about dogs.” - John Osborne, Time 31 Oct 77

“[My dog] can bark like a congressman, fetch like an aide, beg like a press secretary and play dead like a receptionist when the phone rings.” - Gerald B H Solomon, US Congressman, Entry in contest to identify Capitol Hill’s Great American Dog, NY Times 9 Aug 86

“A professor must have a theory as a dog must have fleas.” - H L Mencken, Quoted by Geoffrey H Hartman Easy Pieces Columbia University 85

“This isn’t like naming your dog Spot.” - Richard Melville, Secretary, International Commission on Zoological Nomenclature, On scientific Latin names for plants and animals, Wall Street Journal 13 Jul 84

“First you learn a new language, profanity; and second you learn not to discipline your dogs when you’re mad, and that’s most of the time when you’re training dogs.” - Lou Schultz, trainer of Alaskan Huskies

“He’s fair. He treats us all the same-like dogs.” - Henry Jordan, Green Bay Packers right tackle On Vince Lombardi, recalled on Lombardi’s death 3 Sep 70

“Watching baseball under the lights is like observing dogs indoors, at a pedigree show. In both instances, the environment is too controlled to suit the species.” - Melvin Maddocks, “Baseball-The Difference between Night and Day” Christian Science Monitor 3 Apr 85

“[London] is sentimental and tolerant. The attitude to foreigners is like the attitude to dogs: Dogs are neither human nor British, but so long as you keep them under control, give them their exercise, feed them, pat them, you will find their wild emotions are amusing, and their characters interesting.” - V S Pritchett, London Perceived Harcourt, Brace & World 62

“Things that upset a terrier may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great Dane.” - Smiley Blanton

“I’ve seen a look in dogs’ eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts.” - John Steinbeck

“When a dog bites a man that is not news, but when a man bites a dog that is news.” - Charles Anderson Dana, ‘What is News?’, The New York Sun 1882

“Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.” - Dave Barry

“Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that is how dogs spend their lives.” - Sue Murphy

“I care not for a man’s religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it.” - Abraham Lincoln

“No Matter how little money and how few possessions, you own, having a dog makes you rich.” - Louis Sabin

“The dog is a yes-animal. Very popular with people who can’t afford a yes man.” - Robertson Davies, Canadian author

“No matter how little money and how few possesions you own, having a dog makes you rich.” - Louis Sabin

“Dogs have given us their absolute all. We are the center of ther universe. We are the focus of their love and faith and trust. They serve us in return for scraps. It is without a doubt the best deal man has ever made.” - Roger Caras

“When a man’s best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.” - Edward Abbey

“No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does.” - Christopher Morley

“The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.” - Andrew A. Rooney

“He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.” - Unknown

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